Cooper's Grace

Over the weekend, I spent some time discussing Cooper.  He has been healthy for so long, no hospitalizations, no oxygen requirements, lots of therapy, that now he is almost a different child.  He's SO happy.  He can sit on the floor by himself for long periods of time and just smile and laugh to himself.  I wish I knew what was going on in his head, but I know I may never know.  He doesn't really get our world and we don't really get his.  And I don't know what else to call Cooper's happiness but grace.  I have no doubt that it is God's presence that is reflected in Cooper's happiness.  He is so different than he was even a few months ago and I have truly treasured these drama free months.  I hope this winter is easy, both for our sake and his, but mostly for his.  I have seen now the child Cooper can be when he is healthy.  And I want him to continue to grow and develop.  I want him to keep smiling and laughing.

We went to Clarksdale for the weekend.  Cooper was completely at home.  He has been there enough that it is now one of his places.  He slept well, he was happy to see everyone, and he was relaxed the whole time.  Semmes is too young for that.  He did not sleep well, was over-tired all weekend from having to sleep in a strange place, and was just a little more crabby than normal most of the weekend.  In some ways, as soon as Semmes starts really crawling, he will be more "advanced" than Cooper, but this weekend proved that Semmes still has a ways to go cognitively before he catches up with Cooper.  As Brad put it, Cooper can manipulate us; Semmes isn't there yet.  But when that day comes, the day Semmes, the little brother, is more advanced than Cooper, though I will of course be so proud of Semmes and his development, I will be a little sad too.

But for now, I can praise God for all the good.  And for everything that Cooper has gone through.  And for the gift of his grace.